dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
