I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
