Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Dicks are not precious.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize
