girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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