Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize