wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
