At least make sure they are 18
Why
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
There r osticjed everywhere
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
