his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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