Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
