sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
