called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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