haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Come share oat with me in your robe
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
