Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
