Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
