dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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