she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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