there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
And then he peed in my hair
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