Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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