Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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