How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
