I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
