I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
