Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
