party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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