I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
