So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
