I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
