it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize