He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
