dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
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