I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
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