Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
My dick has a subreddit
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
