i barfeds in our rink
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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