She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
