Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
