i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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