the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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