i need an iv and a liver transplant
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
