Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
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