he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
my poor anus
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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