is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Randomize
