I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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