Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize