So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
