We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
