I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
