dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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