Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i think i have herpe
just one?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
How naked do you want me to be?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
