She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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