Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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