please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
